David: lauren
me: David
me: i smell like fish
David: lol..why?
me: because I have been in a studio around fish and hot lights since 4 am
David: come over and hug me. I want to smell like fish too
me: No, David. No.
me: Are you back from your trip!?
David: yes...finally
David:And i am never leaving you again
David: how was nelson's party on Sunday?
me: good
me: I felt like you were missing
me: I said that to people like 3 times
me: I said, "where is dave. Oh. Yes. I remember."
me: and then i sat silently and sadly
David: i doubt anyone missed me
me: how was camping? tell me everything
me: i don't know anything about you
me: so start from the beginning
me: start from when you were born and tell me the entire story
David: good...i was born by a wet nurse in the jungle of east afraica
me: okay. then what?
David: i was put in a play pen with a beautiful girl baby named amanda...it was made of reeds and mud
me: okay. then what?
David: this robot stormed into the jungle after we played together for 3 years...and took her
and said i could not see her again until i found her soul sister (ss)
David: amanda was very special...and could only be totally happy with me and her ss
me: okay. then what?
David: i trained from 3 years old to 29 years old how to ride horses....I was trained by a tribeswomen named koriiii
David: and when i was finally ready, koriii told me to swim the ocean, steal a horse and ride to Kansas City
me: okay. then what?
me: this is good
David: i went to a huge castle in the middle of three 100-foot water falls
David: there were sparkles and light coming off of the water
David: something was drawing me to this convergence of power and love
David: i cut vines for 5 days and wove a rope that was 90 feet long
David: i tied one end to my horse, Christian Slater, and told him to hold on and pull me up when i cawed like a crow
me: And then what? you turned that rope into a $60 bra?
David: i climbed down the water walls and I saw the most beautiful girls in the world
David: it was amanda and you, lauren. It was you in the water fall!!
me: amanda and i were the convergence of power and love?
David: yes
me: how did you know that? Was it Christian Slater's wish? His passion? His dream?
David: he rode without proper feed for 5 weeks to bring me to you.
David: he wanted us to be together
David: and i needed all my horse training to navigate the rocks and moss surrounding the water falls
me: but why? what was the point? the purpose?
David: because amanda needed to find you before we could all be happy
me: then why am i here?
David: to smell like fish