New Years Resolution - Poo Pears and Pollution

I knew it couldn't last forever - 'it' being the 2-month bender I've been on since the 'LO.' Having fun, spending money, acting like I'm a college kid on perpetual Spring Break. But, with the addition of 14 inches to my waist and the depletion down to $14 in my wallet, I realized it was time to get real - real grown-up that is if I ever want to accomplish my life goals and not die of liver cirrhosis.

I was out to dinner with a dear friend of mine on Saturday. She shared her New Year's resolutions of getting into shape, being confident, finding a boyfriend, etc., and I realized I didn't set one, a resolution, for myself this year. While everyone has been talking as of lates, sharing their New Year's resolutions, I realized just how fucking stupid it all seems. It makes sense to want a fresh start, a cleansing, an annual baptism of sorts on the first day of each year - but none of my 'life goals' (MBA, Lotto Winner, Accomplished Writer) are easily accomplished within a calendar year.

So effing Eff you New Year's Resolutions. My life goals and waistline don't need you and I don't either. I hope you die while I give you this stink eye.