Why Do I Keep Running into Brody Jenner - An Ode to Mandy Meszaros

I have a friend, who is really more of my mentor of life, and her name is Mandy Meszaros. She is currently experiencing a phenomenon of sorts that not many others, well at least none that I know, have experienced before. It is going to sound weird, and even unbelievable, but Brody Jenner keeps showing up every place she goes. Now, I don't think he is actually 'stalking' her, but it's quite bizarre. She will be running on the lakeshore jogging path, and there he is, riding a tandem bike with his new Playgirl, play girl. There was also that time she went to sing karaoke in Boystown with her friend Ellen, and there he was, his fro blocking the monitor, with his buddy Spencer Pratt. Mandy, of course, was humiliated as she fumbled over lines to Chaka Khan's "Slow Dancin," until Ellen saved the day by slow dancing herself - which really got the crowd roaring. Lastly, on the Friday after Thanksgiving, Mandy had been on the hunt for a blue cheese olive stuffer for weeks after her mother accidentally put the family's down the garbage disposal. Well, as you can imagine, at this time of year they are in short supply. She finally found one in Macy's on State street, and who do you think grabbed it right before she did? That's right, Brody Jenner! That bastard. The Meszaro's family will be without blue cheese stuffed olives for a bit longer.

As a tribute to Mandy's hard "jenner" times, I have compiled a few quotes of hers from emails past that will hopefully warm her heart during this cold and frigged season:

"I don't really care too much about what people think...but I would feel retarded running as baby Carry."

"Drinking a giant sugar free Red bull. Becoming happier by the minute. I swear there's drugs in that drink. What are you doing, spaz?"

"I miss you as well. If you didn't have the sh*ts we could have seen each other Tuesday. Let's definitely try to meet up with each other next week. OK??"

"I'm not the cleanest but that could be fun! yeah, C and I talked about you the entire time. I told her how you were anxious about losing your job and were looking elsewhere for in the treasonist detective industry."